I aint no RAT!!!

So here goes the blabber again…this time inspired by the recent placement season in college and certain bitter realities of the ways of the “elite management institute” of the country, hosting the crème della crème of the best brains !! Superlatives and the impact they have… I am back.

The placements went decently in college , and we saw the trends , the requirements , the preferences and the ups and downs which every newspaper must have talked about . Yes, the much sought after “crore” package might have been given . Frankly , didn’t interest me who got it and how much so I m not mentioning it here!!

But what was even more interesting was the changing trends. It seemed that the bankers wanted to be consultants because of the fear in the arena ! Even the so called “studs” were ready to compromise!! What followed this event was the choice of courses in the next term! Inconsistency , struggle for recognition and compromise seems to be the trademark of the place. Well , honestly , I am no different than the crowd and neither do I want certificates from any body here!

But there is no use of this struggle as long as it is directed externally. I have changed my path , and I will no longer entertain this uncalled for change !! I know I say a lot of things. And not all of them I follow. May be a mistake in self analysis. Infact that is the toughest thing to do . To accept one’s shortcoming and fallacies ! Actions depend on situations! Even for me , sometimes 2+2 is a 5 and not 4 ..(that’s an over rating I give to places and people) ..

What is the power of self , if it changes in situations?? That ‘s flabbergasting , yes that is stupefying....But that is the most common occurrence here!! Infact , statistically I would rate a 10/10 to these aberrations. And I aint no party to this anymore!! So I need a break from this rat race ..( dunno if I was ever good enough to be a part of it ..)

But yes , it is good fun watching it from the other side.

What lies ahead from here, well , I really don’t know!

I have dreams which I want to realize ,they are like the flowers which will blossom in spring!!

So if this is the autumn , then I am all geared up for the breeze with my canvas of future and my own colors..and the battle goes on ! But in this race , the winner wont be a rat!!

“My share of the world is my life and I am not negotiating on that.”

You’ll never Walk Alone

Yet another day when I’m in those moods, introspecting so here goes the blabber, for I have this place to pour it out. May be as one of my friends rightly put it, these emotions within make better stories. After all misery sells better than happiness… Not that I am not happy in life and in a miserable state..(I leave this question for the time being) But never had I thought before entering through the portals of this “weird jungle” that I shall be reduced to a mere spectator, observing people chase their dreams, fight for survival, thinking when will I see the sunshine , the light that will lead me to the path I want to tread on.

Just bumped into the thought of whether life is a dumb trick!! Either you find yourself hankering for something you so badly wanted to own, or you end up bemoaning what you are in. Thinking you could have probably turned the world around had you got one more chance. But the bitter truth is, it wouldn’t have made any difference either. The optimist in me (who currently is on a sabbatical I guess) says whatever happens is for our good and keeps me going.

But there are times when the kid inside rebels, for reason and objectivity. But then the world doesn’t run on reason all the time! The grey areas just seem to cloud it all.

Recently I have been made a mentor to some students who are “MBA Aspirants” and as they ask me how to go about things, I really feel whether or not I am the right person to tell them? Since even I was not sure which wave brought me to this island where the struggle for survival and the associated pressure just do not seem to cease? But life outside is even tougher is what they say! So which side of the game will I land up in? Game, yes that is what we all are a part of, and I am keen to know my score at this one! But I am not sure whether I‘ll get to play my moves or not!!

Scientifically we all are looking for an equilibrium state. And I know I’m not the only one fighting. This is a contention against precariousness, against the conflicts within. Sometimes I feel who are we fighting against? May be the most powerful weapon is time…

But currently I don’t think it is on my side….

The dreamer within again rests humming these words---

When you walk through a storm
Hold your head up high
And don't be afraid of the dark
At the end of the storm
Is a golden sky
And the sweet silver song of a lark

Walk on through the wind
Walk on through the rain
Though your dreams be tossed and blown
Walk on, walk on
With hope in your hearts
And you'll never walk alone
You'll never walk alone
You'll never walk alone

- Gerry & the Pace Makers